FRIVOLOUS DIVORCE
DON’T MAKE THE MISTAKE I MADE.
You’re probably a woman, like me, but men do it, too. Your marriage is boring and life is passing you by. You are dying on the vine and deserve more from life.
If you’re a woman, that life is about true love with your soul mate, even if you haven’t met him yet. If you’re a man, it’s all about sex. And man or woman, you are determined to get what you want….but first you need to be independent.
How do I know you so well? Because I was you. I’m just guessing about the minds of men, of course, but I know YOU, ladies. And I want to warn you about the mistake you are about to make.
You are about to commit something like a murder. Not a murder, but something like a murder. It will include death (the death of your family), grieving victims (your spouse and children, and eventually you), shame (hopefully you will be very ashamed one day), humiliation (your children will be embarrassed by your behavior and your spouse will be humiliated by the rejection), financial devastation (for everyone), and the intrusion of the State into the personal details of your life.
This site is not intended for victims of adultery, abuse, or other serious issues that may cause people to divorce. Rather, it is intended for those whose spouses have done nothing wrong and do not deserve to have their lives destroyed. It is intended for the frivolous.
Please read the warnings I’ve posted on this site before you file for a frivolous divorce. If I had only known then what I know now I would still be married to the wonderful husband that I threw away like a piece of garbage. Don’t make the same mistake I made.
It’s funny, but it seems to go in a kind-of wave in groups of married friends.
I wonder why.
I think this website is made by a man. I have yet to meet a woman (or a man for that matter) with such self-reflection.
With all due respect to your blog, which is quite heartfelt and honest and good advice, this sentence might have something to do with why things turned out the way they did:
“I’m just guessing about the minds of men, of course”
Men are generally not difficult to understand, but neither are they the caveman creatures portrayed in consumer product ads and sitcoms. From Cosmo on up (plus on TV), women are taught a silly view of men as boorish, easily manipulated creatures who are means to her end. The result of this condescension is many women never really learn how to appreciate a man’s emotional side (unless of course the emotions motivate him to do stuff for her).
It’s all well and good for a third party to warn people about how much divorce sucks, but imagine if people really understood and “groked” their spouses – if you REALLY got how a divorce would feel to him, and to any sons you might have. You wouldn’t NEED a website like this, you’d KNOW how demonic it was.
“If you’re a woman, that life is about true love with your soul mate, even if you haven’t met him yet. If you’re a man, it’s all about sex.”
Probably not. A practicing family psychologist did a major study on male infidelity (not sure when he’s coming out with the female study) which found by far the most common reason men cheated on their wives was not sex – it was feeling unappreciated at home. You’ve already stated here that you exhibited those behaviors.
Divorce for sex? I can’t think of a single case I’ve ever heard of where a man divorced to get nookie elsewhere where there wasn’t already an affair going on.
It blows my mind how few young and middle-aged women I meet who really understand and try to empathize with men.
I disagree, Artem. In the 80′s, while a well known MRA, a woman in her 50′s that I worked with told me a similar tale. Except she did not divorce him. She just realized with age that he had always tried as hard as he could to please her, and it was never enough. No matter what he did, she found fault with him.
She figured it out, and said she hoped she had time to make it up to him.
So, though it may be rare, it does happen.
I assure you I am a woman and this is my real story.
Something tells me that feminista apologistic metrosexual and other Beta Males, like Artem, have never met a very self-reflecting person because wonderful things tend to hide from people who refuse to believe in their existence. Perhaps they, like the feministas themselves, even deny that many a woman regrets the selfish abortion, frivolous divorce, and/or neglected children in her past. Maybe he, like the guilt-ridden women themselves, pretends that such guilt doesn’t occur.
Most women WON’T express their guilt and regret, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Any human being with a conscience will, to varying degrees, eventually come to regret his/her own spiteful misdeeds and malicious behavior. Probably the most important lesson a real man needs to learn about women is that they usually WON’T express their true feelings to us…, WHILE expecting us to read their minds. No more than they would admit that we are correct when we DO know exactly what’s on their minds.
Then I must say:
My ex wife is in the same boat.
She was bored; thought she could have more fun; got divorced. I was truly a devoted husband – Beta man to the max, always trying to please, but she walked.
I recovered and 6 years later have a string of interesting experiences and perhaps another relationship – but this time, there will be no continual pleasing of my partner. I’m going to make her work for it.
On the other hand, my ex wife, good person that she is, I respect her still – has been tooled by two men, both bad boys and who just ran her through the wringer thoroughly, and then ditched her (as bad boys are wont to do) – and she recently commented to a common friend that maybe getting a divorce was a mistake.
She’s approaching 40 (almost there) and single. No kids. No man. No prospects.
She recently apologized to me for the divorce and the frivolous way she entered into it. She asked if I felt better – I said yes, … of course, I was working through my Nth interesting relationship (I recovered after 8 months of hell).
While I got more interesting and more fun to be around, she just got completely lost.
I feel badly for her; I wouldn’t change it now, but I think she cheated herself.
Female hypergamy cheated her.
Respect!!
Appreciate your honesty. Thankyou for showing young girls the right path(for the fist time) .
Thankyou
Not really keen on those divorce stats, eh? Men arent doing it for sex. They’re not doing it at all. Well, there are some-but they are far outmached by the soon to be ex-wives and their new best friend of a divorce lawyer. Ex-wives who will soon be sinking into the rut of the past her prime single mom and lawyers that will soon be trying out their new pool. So sorry you bit the forbidden fruit of “my husband is sooo boring, I bet I could upgrade” only to find it has a very bitter taste. The taste of “oh crap, I’ve been had!”. I know, you got suckered. Like an 18 year old at a car dealership with just enough cash for a downpayment. Caveat emptor, eh?
I’ve always thought that women don’t want marriages; they want weddings. After all, weddings are fun, and everyone fawns over her all day long.
Marriages aren’t like that; they are hard work. They don’t open a door to daily romance and intimacy. They don’t have immediate, lottery-style payoffs. They don’t automatically improve one’s mood, life, or mind-set.
They mean, sometimes, being bored.
They mean, sometimes, frustration.
They mean, sometimes, emotional as well as physical exhaustion.
And, for however much a wife may feel this, the husband feels it on some level as well, and probably to a greater degree.
Why do husbands generally die earlier than their wives?
Because they can.
The only difference is, that the de-facto law of the land, and default posture is that a woman has the power to screw her husband over and get a round of applause for doing so. Don’t believe me? How many protests are launched against websites such as Ashley Madison and Women’s Infidelity dot com?
None.
Marriage is for extremely dense men. It is an institution that, over the course of one day, has reduced a man from a sentient human being to livestock, pack-mules, and wage slaves. Those numbers aren’t diminishing any time soon, more’s the pity. As for those who divorce and find newly-single life to be less than hoped for, all I can say is:
Bed. Made. Lie.
The broken pieces of shattered lives surround us all.
How much more damage can feminism do, before it is stopped?
You’ve been deceived by a system operating since 60s. Sorry but there are no way to come back. You can help more woman writing e-book. Choose a impactant title and publish in many sites you can.